Bob Bencomo

Monica becomes inarticulate while giving her toast at a 35th wedding anniversary party for her parents, Jack and Judy, and regrets volunteering to make the speech instead of Ross. Phoebe brings her latest boyfriend, Parker, an effusive optimist who is so enthusiastic about everything that he makes people crazy. Meanwhile, Ross is astounded when Jack and Judy ask him and the pregnant Rachel to pretend to be married, in order to prevent a potential scandal.

When J.D. is asked to introduce Dr. Kelso at an awards dinner, he sets out to discover something good to say about the grouchy doctor.

Gaining a new perspective -- Michael Weston guest stars-- When J.D. develops vasovagal syncope, a condition which results in fainting or blackouts, he finds himself not only having to deal with losing his girlfriend and his apartment, but also his consciousness. Eliot and Turk debate over whose turn it is to take care of the always down on his luck resident, while Carla tries out her new excuse "I have a baby." Elsewhere, the Janitor embarks on a cruise vacation...or does he?

Three's a Crowd - Keri Russell Guest Stars - J.D. (Zach Braff) feels a little left out when Eliot's (Sarah Chalke) wild sorority sister, Melody (Keri Russell) comes to town. Not able to deal with being the third wheel he turns the girls against each other in the hopes that he will once again be Eliot's priority friend and, if he is lucky, that he might get to "mash" it with Melody. Meanwhile, Turk (Donald Faison) and Dr. Cox (John C. McGinley) go head to head when they disagree over whether or not a patient requested surgery is necessary. Elsewhere, Carla (Judy Reyes) discovers an unlikely ghost haunting pediatrics in an attempt to keep it clean. In the end one of Sacred Hearts own will be considering a marriage proposal. Ken Jenkins and Neil Flynn also star.

That's not funny -- Michael Weston Guest Stars -- The day has come for Private Brian Dancer (Michael Weston) to be released from Sacred Heart, but when the military informs him that his injuries are too severe to return to service he spirals into a state of depression. Eliot (Sarah Chalke), J.D. (Zach Braff) and Turk (Donald) rally around him to boost his spirit. Meanwhile, Dr. Cox (John C. McGinley) informs Carla (Judy Reyes) that her jokes are just not funny. Ken Jenkins and Neil Flynn also star.