Nicola Murray MP has only been secretary of state for just over a week, but already there is press speculation on how long she will last. And now someone at the Department of Social Affairs and Citizenship has completely wiped the immigration records of 170,672 people. Who's going to get the blame? Who's going to get the job of breaking the news to Malcolm? And how is Nicola going to get through an entire lunch with the staff of the Guardian without revealing the catastrophic scale of the latest computer disaster?