It's 1914 and millions of men have shipped off to war, yet three young men have stayed behind.

News arrives that the first Rittle man has died in battle and Bert makes a move on his widow.

George kicks Bert out of the cottage after he crosses the line one too many times.

A paranoid Cecil is convinced he's being systematically emasculated.

George excitedly throws a dinner party and invites Miss Trimble, the local village leper.

The trio finally have some other men to talk to when the soldiers return on leave.