Jade shows off her new girlfriend, ce-lez-bian DJ, Samantha Fox, whilst Michael looks forward to meeting up with the man of his online dreams. That is until he realises the hot bollywood actor-slash-model has a fake profile and is more of a dud than a dream. Jade and Stacey get caught up in his dating dilemma and it becomes a herpes fuelled nightmare for all of them.

Jade steals Stacey’s precious ring for an exciting night out on the red carpet with her celebrity lover, Samantha Fox. Unfortunately the ring gets lost in the most unusual (and intimate) of places and Michael and his ‘doctor’ boyfriend get called in to solve this unconventional medical emergency.

Jade is horrified to discover that her brother is dating her best ‘fenemy’, Michael. She finds herself completely absorbed in breaking them up, no matter what the cost.

John attempts to find love online where he encounters Clare, the Net Nanny, and gets to know her on an intimate level.